“And for the rest everyone can judge for themselves. Bye dad.” With this sentence, and with an old photograph, Gianluca Grignani announced his parent’s death to his fans.
A complex relationship
Paolo Grignani, Gianluca’s father, died on Monday 2 October. The man he lived in HungaryAnd he didn’t talk to his son for fifteen years. A dealer in supplies for photographers, he was often away from home. And, his absence played an important role in Gianluca Grignani’s life, especially in his childhood and adolescence. The artist dedicated the song to him When you miss the breath, presented at the Sanremo Festival 2023. The text recalls a phone call between the two, made about ten years ago, by which time Gianluca had made peace with the divorce between his parents (which occurred when he was 18). A divorce that had enormous consequences on his life: his father left, putting him in the middle, and thus leaving him prey to feelings of guilt and loneliness.
A song full of pain
When you’re out of breathactually, it’s about death. But it also talks aboutLoveof forgiveness, of a mistreated but still present bond.
“Hi I’m dad
How’s Gianluca doing?
But no, I’m not sick
But when will it happen
You will come to my funeral or not
Are you coming or not?“
the father asks Grignani.
“Hello dad or goodbye dad
I’m singing this song to you now
So that you know that I love you anyway
And for the rest everyone should judge for themselves“.
The singer told how the parent was often distant for work, and how in fact in the first years of his life he never saw him. Theirs relationship was born during a business trip to Turin. Then, after the separation, she broke down forever.
The difficulty of having a family
To his timeGianluca Grignani is the father of four children. However, after the separation from his wife Francesca, only the eldest remained to live with him. “The most difficult in life it’s having a family” he told Mara Venier, referring to his family of origin as the one he built. The wounds in the relationship with mum and dad, despite the fact that he managed to rediscover harmony with the former, are not are never completely healed mom she pushed him away when he needed it, he explained. That was her way of educating. The Pope, however, has always described him as a selfish man, who never wanted to make up for his mistakes. “It took me 44 years to understand it, to process that void,” he said. Loneliness, however, was accompanied by fear. The fear of being similar to a person who has made mistakes, whom he doesn’t know whether to accuse or excuse, and whose image he lacks. The difference between him and the parent? Gianluca has never heard himself say “I love you”. While he, to his children, does not stop saying it.